If you can’t understand “how someone could think that way”, that’s a problem

I see it on social media a lot, and I’m sure you do too:

• “I don’t understand how someone could believe that”
• “I don’t know how someone could support that particular political candidate”
• “Why would she do that?”

In most cases, people have solid reasons for what they believe. You may disagree with their reasons, but understanding where they’re coming from is a great place to start. You may not initially understand why someone could vote for “that person”, but there are likely some solid reasons behind that vote.

In her book “Blind Spots“, author Madeleine Van Hecke says it this way:

It’s very hard for most of us to admit that our judgment of others as idiots is as much a comment on our own blind spots as it is on the flaws we detect in other people. Those flaws may be devastatingly real, but if we truly cannot understand why or how others think or act in the way they do, then we, too, must have a blind spot: something is preventing us, at least at the moment, from grasping the perspective that differs from our own.

Understanding the perspective of others has nothing to do with agreeing with them, but working to see things from their eyes can help expand your own viewpoint. It’s like I shared last year, I find great value in trying to see things from both sides of the aisle. It’s not easy, but can help you gain empathy for others and can lead to some productive and informative conversations in the future.